The One with The Football

The days in the hostel were long and boring mostly. Rohan would put himself through the same routine of college to hostel day after day and play card games with a few class mates to entertain himself, but somewhere deep inside he was missing the fire. There was no internet, no friends to chat up with on, no inspiration to live in short. There was the odd call or two he would get from his seniors who would put him through stupid chores like making up a CV or mugging up their names and other details, they did this activity in a group and certain details put a smile on each of their faces but Rohan had his mind somewhere else and after almost four weeks he had failed to wrap his head around that place. What was there in that place anyways. Rohan once concluded that everyone living in that hostel, at least once everyday, wonders to himself as to what is his purpose in that place. "Tagore Chatravaas" read the board outside the hostel, more like "Tagore Kaaravaas", he believed.

The highlight of the week would be when Meghna would call him up for the readings. He'd run to the quietest corner in the wing with the book and tell her the readings as if they were the combination to the safe that housed his life savings. The exchange of readings would take barely a minute and then Rohan would start talking to her about how her day was and then follow it up with how her week was. They would talk like this for as long as both could sustain the call on their bills and then disconnect politely. At the age of seventeen, Rohan had no idea what these little chit chats over the phone meant, neither did he know how to categorize her, if she was a friend, a crush or a love interest. As if life was not troubling enough already, he had to name these little things now too. "Life is biased" he thought "but why is it always biased against me?". He had no answer to this question.

Just as he was trying to figure the answer to the question, he heard a loud roar from the TV room, followed by some commentary. He decided to check out what it was. There was a bunch of people watching a football match between Liverpool and Inter Milan. He joined them and took a side next to a tall and bulky fellow from Kerala. All Rohan knew about him was his state of origin and name, Vijay Kurian. They exchanged smiles and started talking about the finer details of the game. How Materazzi did not deserve that Red Card or how Steven Gerrard should have floated the ball in for Torres rather than try to hit the target. They even talked about how disjointed the current English National Team was and how there should be an overhaul of the footballing system back in Italy. Rohan for the first time thought he met someone who lived on the same wavelength as him and enjoyed things he did too. They asked each other which team were the supporting for the last year's World Cup and incidentally  they were both fans of the Italians, another thirty minutes or so were spent discussing the magical moments of that campaign, Totti's penalty to Del Piero's injury time winner and Grosso's celebration, matters of past like Baggio, Maldini etc were also remembered. After the game was over and everyone had left, Rohan invited Vijay for a bite to his room, he lit a cigarette and asked Vijay which was his favorite club. Vijay replied Juventus, almost embarrassed of the fact and asked Rohan what was his favorite club. Rohan said Juventus too. They both looked at each other and smiled, maybe at the fact that they were the only two people in the whole of the city who knew about the existence of such a club or maybe at the fact that how fate had brought them together. Rohan knew one fact at that moment, he had found his first friend in that place. That night he slept in peace after weeks.

The One with The Detention

The suicide was a shock to everyone in the hostel to say the least. Rohan had never seen someone faint all his life and here he was, new place, new people, new faces, no friends and the flash of that dead body stuck in his head. He did not even know his name, what place was he from, how he looked, nothing. Rohan's parents were shaken by the incident too and decided to take him along with them to Delhi over the weekend. Throughout the train journey, he couldn't catch a nap for a second and the only question that bit him was how can a person decide to end his life after being cussed at for three days. He had caught a glance of his room mate crying, when he was leaving the hostel. They had known each other for just three days and the boy was crying like a child, Rohan could only imagine the plight of the parents of the deceased kid. Then at that very moment he made a promise to himself, no matter how down the chips are for him in the future he will never put his friends and parents through something like this.


When he returned from Delhi, his first week in MNNIT was already over. That morning when they went to class, there was no one out there to insult their parents, siblings or them. He was happy about being able to go to class without being swore at but somewhere deep inside, he missed the banter. He always did find it funny after all. Back in classes, it was a practical file submission day in the Electrical Lab. Nitin Singh sat there like a huge sack of sugar and the students kept coming through to present him with their files which he would sign uninterestedly. When Rohan went up with his group, he checked their readings and found out that Meghna's readings did not match that of the group's. He asked if it was she who copied or the boys. Meghna stood there, silent, shocked and maybe a bit embarrassed too,
"Sir, it was my mistake." Rohan blurted out, "I lost the original readings and made them up.".
He promptly cancelled their experiments and asked them to leave the class, the entire group, and return only after writing the correct one. Rohan had made up his mind to go and sit in the canteen and submit the file next week, but the others said they can do it within the hour. He was out numbered and out voted three to one.

In the library, they tried making the best of their time.With the limited time and information they had, they manipulated the data to reflect what they thought was the truest assessment of their experiment. Meghna was a bit agitated because she thought, she should not have been there out with them, after all she did what was right according to her. She even yelled at Rohan for being so stupid and keeping her out of the loop. He smiled and asked her to calm down and stop over reacting, teachers pull those kind of stunts all the time he said. She told him to get on with his work and hurry up. He agreed and finished the writing right on time and just before they were leaving to show their work to the teacher one more time. Meghna said politely "Rohan, can I have your phone number?". Rohan's heart skipped a beat, he gave it to her and then his mind wandered to a number of scenarios where he would talk to her for long hours and then maybe end up being with her. When she called out his name again and asked him to join them, he snapped out of it and said it out aloud

"Bad Idea"

The One with The Surprise

The second time Rohan was dressing up for his college, there were no fancy clothes to put on and no sneakers to pull on. Instead he wore the formal white shirt and trousers as instructed by his senior and put on a pair of formal black shoes, since he struggled with laces, his room mate tied them up for him. The shoes were a bit icky on the sole and the dress was way too bland and formal for his liking but he had to pull through them as some one some where had decided, this was the way to instill discipline in the new boys. Also, he was allotted a set of three friends who were NRIs just like him and also a dedicated bunch of NRI seniors which were prominently from the Gulf.

They took the same road to the classes and it was the same old treatment from the seniors. The cuss words were mostly the same and few new ones which Rohan promptly added to his already overflowing dictionary. Today, they had a lecture on Physics and Mathematics and Rohan was looking forward to them as he found those classes interesting back in school. The excitement was all but dying when the teacher for Physics walked in. He was a stout person with a receding hairline, dark complexioned and had a small face with an unimpressive mustache. Great, thought Rohan, another nigger. The teacher started asking everyone introduction and seemed oddly interested in the girls seated in the first two rows. After the exchange of information with everyone, he walked up to the board and wrote "ALBERT EINSTEIN" in huge letters and asked if anyone knew about him. Rohan looked around and when no one seemed ready, he promptly raised his hand and spoke about the great. He detailed everything significant about Einstein including his two marriages and sat down once he felt he had said enough. When the teacher asked the person sitting next to him, he stood and said, "Sir, I don't think we can add anything more to what he has said." The class broke into a belated round of applause and a star was born.

When the Physics lecture was over, the students moved out for water and some fresh air and a few even came over to Rohan and exchanged names and pointed out that they should hang out some time. After roughly fifteen minutes a middle aged skinny, brown man with a harmless face walked in, he was carrying a dirty satchel and introduced himself as the Mathematics professor for the semester. Rohan immediately thought what was up with the standards of the teachers in this college, not a single one yet had looked worthy of being called one. He started asking every one's name and was very specifically concerned with every one's AIR in the qualifying exams. When it was Rohan's turn, he lied his AIR was 1114 and did not blink once when the teacher asked how did he manage it. When it was Meghna's turn she announced that she was an NRI and did not go through a qualifying exam, the teacher started lecturing her in his rugged English on how she will have a tough time trying to catch up with the more intelligent members of this class. She heard whatever he told silently but had a very sad expression on her face, she was almost red with embarrassment. Rohan saw this and at that moment he knew that this teacher can earn a lot of things but he will never earn his respect.

When Rohan returned back to the hostel, he took a quick shower and changed into a decent pair of shorts and tee shirt when he had the surprise of his life. His parents had flown down all the way from USA to surprise him and surprised he was. Thankfully, the cigarettes and butts are out, thought Rohan. After having a chat and finishing the box of cookies his mother brought him, he was getting ready to leave with his parents for a night out in the town. When he went into the balcony to change into a pair of jeans, he saw a guard running frantically yelling

"Gate kholo, ek ladke ne suicide kiya hai!"

The One with The First Day

The first day of college was a very normal one, Rohan's alarm rang at the set time and he snoozed it and went back to sleep as was his habit. One of his room mates, a short portly kid named Amit, shook him out of his slumber. Rohan got up, rubbed his eyes and went to the toilet with a toothbrush in his mouth, grumbling about how he had just fallen asleep. A shit, shave and shower for 15 minutes followed by application of 3 types of different creams (an aftershave, a moisturizer and a sun screen) left Rohan looking lesser like a student on the first day off his college and more like a wannabe model on the verge of his first ramp walk. The common theme was they both prayed that the day ahead went well.

When Rohan joined the others at the hostel gate in a crowd, he felt this reminded him of that one time he was with his family at Times Square to watch the ball drop. He snapped out of it instantly and realized that there was no happy ending to this countdown. The crowd was rearranged into a line and after a head count, they started walking. It was as if a giant human centipede was crawling out of a hole, for as long as Rohan could see, ahead or behind, he'd see boys, in tees and shirts, tall and short, portly and skinny, just walking, shepherded by a bunch of guards. No one knew where the classes would happen and who would sit next to who, but they were just walking ahead.

Once, they entered through a gate, there was this building which looked like a hostel but was unusually quiet. Rohan looked up and spotted a person, leaning on a railing. When their eyes met, he yelled "Upar kya dekhta hai? Neeche dekh!" followed by something unpleasant about Rohan's mom. Well, this was absurd, what have I ever done to him, wondered Rohan. If that was absurd, he had no idea what was in store for him at the next turn. Just as the centipede turned a corner, there was aloud roar and all types of cuss words were yelled. People were equated to dogs, mothers were insulted, sister's characters were brought into question, fathers weren't spared either. Rohan heard all of them, giggled to himself and wondered, why was he there.

Once they were away from that hoard and within the safe environments of the academic block, which by the way was littered with postings about Ragging being a crime, Rohan found out that he had his practical class in an Electrical Lab. On the way to the lab there were many questions on his mind. "Why were they all pissed at us?" "If they catch me alone, will they beat the shit out of me?" "Why are these Ragging is an Offense posters here, when no one pays attention to them?" "What does the subject name EEE stand for?" "Why am I going to an Electrical Lab, when I'm studying Computer Science?"

All of these questions were irrelevant and had no answers, at least not sensible ones, but then Rohan did not know that yet. Once he was there, he introduced himself to this huge teacher and found out that the subject was called Electrical and Electronics Engineering and the teacher's name was Nitin Singh. He was redirected to another lab with a manual and a sheet to record his results in and told that the other members of his group are there already. He reached there and found two other boys waiting, he introduced himself and they got down to doing their work. They joined the circuits, plugged in the meters and pulled the switch, the bulbs glowed and just as they were observing the readings of the meters, Rohan's eyes caught the sight of the fourth member of the group walking in. In the glow of the bulbs, it seemed as though Venus herself has decided to walk down the earth. Once the bulbs were switched off and Rohan had snapped out of his marvel at the girl, they acquainted themselves and he remembered she was the girl from the bank the other day. Her name was Meghna and he knew the other details. Two Mississippi.

When the classes were over and every one was lining up at the spot to be escorted back to their hostel, a short, skinny fellow came around and asked if any one among them was an NRI, Rohan promptly raised his hand. The fellow came over and said "Kal se aise kapdon mein dikha toh kapde phaad dunga! Get yourself a haircut and buy yourself a pair of white formals and a pair of black shoes. That shall be your uniform. Take down my number and wait for my call around 9." After these orders the short guy just disappeared and Rohan stayed there, stuck, thinking what just happened.

The One with The Realization

Allahabad was a weird place for Rohan. He had been to Delhi, Mumbai, Lucknow, Ghazipur, Dhanbad and Faizabad earlier but this city was different. It was like an important town had forgotten to wake up in time for the race to become the next big city and was now trying desperately to join the league. There was the bustling Civil Lines with its McDonald's and Big Bazaar and then the dirty by-lanes of Teliyarganj. Rohan waited for almost half an hour for a cab and then realized, they don't have them in this city, he finally decided on taking a rickshaw. One thing that he found weird was that every rickshaw puller or auto driver did not know what MNNIT was but agreed to drop him at the engineering college. That was the first time he doubted the "premier" tag attached to his college to be.

If Allahabad as a city was weird, the college campus was a bigger surprise for our hero. This is nothing like a college they show in those teen movies, he thought to himself and asked the guard where should he go for his registration in his usual flowing English and the guard stared back at him blankly. Great, thought Rohan, these people don't even know my language. Finally, he managed to get the directions to the Academic building where he would become a member of this almost 50 year old college. It was early June and not a speck of cloud in the sky, Rohan walked with his uncle to the said building carefully surveying the dilapidated gates and buildings of the Library and the Civil Department of the college.

The Academic building was  bustling with activity that day because of some sort of counseling. He somehow made his way through the throngs of people and went on to see a fat, loud, dark and silver haired man who somehow seemed important. He handed Rohan a set of documents, which were supposed to be filled in very carefully. Rohan filled every detail, cross checked it once and submitted the documents back to the same person and he was redirected to another slim and dark Bengali. What have I got to do to see a few white men out here, thought Rohan to himself. The Bengali was a student of the college and after making a few snide remarks to Rohan about the "class" of NRIs which come to that college, asked him to make drafts from the Vijaya Bank. Throughout the course of the conversation Rohan was flipping birds at that stuttering bong and beating the living daylights out of him in his head.

The bank with a running air conditioner was a respite from the burning heat of the outside. Rohan sat in for a moment and then went up to the manager and politely asked the procedure for obtaining a draft, he went to the counter after filling in his form and submitted it quietly. Just as he was about to leave, he ran into this girl, fair, li'l stocky, tall, had curly hairs, wore glasses and smiled in the most beautiful way possible. She asked him for a pen and little help with the  draft form, he duly obliged and after making some small talk, Rohan realized that she much like him was also an NRI from UK and about to enroll in the Computer Science and Engineering course plus she had a brother studying at this college already, a fact which she said with a twinkle in her eye and with that amazing smile. One Mississippi. After completing all the formalities and running through numerous rooms and standing in many queues, Rohan finally became a student of the college at around five in the evening.

Next step was to get a room and shop for it. The first part was fairly simple, the second required a lot of running around in the marketplace and bargaining with the vendors. Once all the boxes were ticked, Rohan moved into his new room and laid down the mattress and after setting up all the things in the room right up till the last detail, he bade farewell to his uncle and came out to the gate of the hostel to see him off. He went out for a snack and bought himself a packet of cigarettes. After completing all the errands for the day, he called up his parents and assured them that he shall be fine in the new surrounding and this change in atmosphere shall help his growth as a man. He even tried calling up his girl but she could not answer for some reason. So, after a tiring day, Rohan went to bed with an awkward feeling in his head, he lit up a cigarette and dragged lazily onto it and then he thought

 "What the fuck have I done?"

The One Where It All Starts

"Tiny scattered moments ... 
Sprinkled on the garden of memories.
Strolling, bare foot, on them, it feels we've wandered too far ... 
Now we can't remember, where we left our shoes.
Our heels were soft when we got here, they still feel tender.
And they will remain fragile, till those bittersweet memories, keep tingling them.
True, we've forgotten, where we left our shoes ...
But now it seems, we don't need them anymore. "  -- Rajat Barmecha in Udaan

But where did Rohan remove his shoes? When and how did he decide to undertake this whole journey?
Maybe it starts at the day he failed in Chemistry in his 12th grade, or probably the day he got over with his Board Exams for the same class. A simple boy who knew nothing of life apart from his school and home and there he was after five years  as an engineer, staring at the blank sky thinking, where to now?

Maybe the right point to consider a start would be the day Rohan landed in Delhi. It was an early May morning and Delhi was hot as, well Delhi. After meeting his sister and having their pleasant li'l chat he settled into her place and got acquainted with the neighbors. He moved on for his grandma's place after three days and once he was there, he realized it was going to be one long month of nothing but questions, the answers to which he did not know and retrospection, Rohan very soon learned that "How did life bring him to that point? " will be a one question that will run through his head a lot number of times over that one month, little did he know that very question will become a central theme of his life for many years to come.

After a filling home cooked meal, Rohan took up his cell phone and dialed in the number, a number he knew by heart and when the girl answered at the other end, his heart skipped a beat. 
"How, art thou woman?" asked Rohan in his usual style and they talked for barely a minute, Rohan had just told her how crappy and full of mosquitoes India was that he realized the international calling rates in India. He wasn't in L. A. anymore, he disconnected in haste and promised to see her online after a few hours, an appointment he will eventually miss, (more on that later.) and felt a pang of separation. Not from the girl, but from his family, his parents and siblings and suddenly Rohan felt lonely for the first time, the unusual thing about it was that he was at "home". He fought the pain of separation and maybe a few tears and plugged in his I-pod and let David Gilmour work his magic.
He woke up with a start around dinner time and realized that the girl must be deep in her sleep and she would understand the reason behind his absence at the said time, why won't she they've been best friends for 3 years now. Rohan obediently went to have his own dinner after his grandma called him for it.

The next day was going to be a big day in Rohan's life. He had to leave for Allahabad, for his admission in a premier institute of engineering.


Four years, thought Rohan, what can possibly change in four years. He had no idea what was in store for him. He had no clue as to what storm his life would be hit with. He would meet friends, enemies and irrelevant people. He will find love and lose himself for it. His life was to change forever, and to an extent  that he could've never imagined in the wildest of his dreams.